My Muddy Wife

Even though I'm out of action for a while, Susan has taken it upon herself to see that we continue to make remodeling progress, even if it's only a little bit.

After a good solid Sunday of not much activity, she went to work on the wall where we had the new French Doors installed in the kitchen last year. That's right, they were installed last year and we are only now getting around to fixing the wall around them. It has been a low priority project so get off your high horse, you Sanctimonious Home Remodeling Disparager, you!

Sorry, sometimes the pain pills I'm on cause me to loose a little control. I don't mean to blame the drugs but I blaming the drugs.

So she got out the sander and the mud and went to work on the wall. She got a good start on it and will finish it up tomorrow. She might even be so ambitious as to paint it by the end of the week.

Projects go much faster here when I'm out of the picture, you Bombastic Judgementer of Domicile Rehabilitation Promptitude, you.

Remodeling and Improvement shall continue

Todays' big remodeling project is not really about remodeling as much as it is about cleaning. My closet is a disaster and now that I have some time on my hands, with limited ability to do much of anything, cleaning/organizing fits the bill.

But first, a nap!

De Fib Day

Home remodeling will have to go on the back burner for a few days asI have to hit the Hospital for some body remodeling.

I'm getting a dephibrillator installed today because I'm a 52 year old in a 70 year olds body.

If this ends up being my last post, you'll know why.

However, this is the blog about the house so if you want to hear me drone on and on and on about my health, check out http://www.porkymccorpulent.blogspot.com/.

Of course, if that one stops mysteriously too...well, what can I say.

To quote Dr. Sidney Freedman from M*A*S*H:
Ladies and Gentlemen, take my advice,
Pull down your Pants and Slide on the Ice.

Home Improvement Continues

Well, we finally got Cousin Louise out of the house. That means we don't have to devote all that time to entertaining her, having her take us out to dinner and having her clean the house. Finally, we can get back to the daily drudgery of home remodeling. Thanks for coming, Louise!

Here's one of our projects that is coming along nicely. The columns on the front porch are no longer sinking. It took a couple of weeks and about $400.00 but that seems cheap compared to having the roof cave in.I'm not sure I have mentioned anything about Squiggy. He is our friendly squirrel who is not afraid to come up to the door to get some food. As you can see in this picture, his tail is askew. It's hanging on by a hair...literally.

He looks like he has been in a fight with some other animal. Since this picture was taken, the end of his tail has fallen off. The picture doesn't really show his injuries but he looks pretty beat up.

So I feel compelled to make sure he's well fed over the next few days. I'm not going to loose another squirrel on my watch!

Solstice Success

Another successful Solstice is in the rear view mirror. All our preparations went smoothly and Susan didn't get too tense before the event. We got a little extra help from her cousin Louise who came over from Seattle for the party. That was a nice surprise.

It was a large crowd of revelers and everyone had a great time and enjoyed my fabulous homebrew. My second attempt at Drop Top Ale was much more successful than the first, although we did manage to empty that keg too.

Here are a couple of pictures I managed to remember to take during the evening. I decided to protect the indentity of my party goers since I didn't get their permission to post their photographs.

However, I think those involved (Ron & Kelly) know who they are.

Clean up was easy and we were in bed by Two. All in all, a great party and fun was had by me!

Solstice Preparations

With one day to go before the Summer Solstice Party, we are pretty much on schedule. Susan goes into Slave Driver mode prior to any event we host and it can be quite ugly for those who get in her way...or don't complete the list of things given to them.

However, everything seems to be going along smoothly except for the weather. It is rainy today but the forecast is suggesting we might have a chance to avoid rain tomorrow. It's going to be cooler but no rain would be the coolest of all.

I'm working at the bar tomorrow but only for a couple of hours. That will allow me to abscond with the ice I need and still make a little money to buy the booze I need.

I scored with Spokane Cedar Products. They had the cedar siding I needed to complete the work on the columns and piers on the front porch. Now I just need to get Phil back.

Hops Tops Out! and less important stuff

The Hops has made it to the top of the arbor. That's about twelve feet. It is time to celebrate and identify this momentous occasion because we have so little going on in our lives that momentous occasions include plant growth. But it does pass as a significant milestone because I really wanted them to be over the top in time for the Solstice Party.Phil continues to work on the front porch. My only obstacle now is the siding, which I have not yet figured out an alternative for. I don't need that much (40 feet) so I'm going to see if my guy at Windsor Plywood can come up with something. Today I am meeting with my Cardiac Electrician. We are going to discuss all the ramifications of the DePhil-A-Brator they are installing in me. I have a whole list of questions.

• Can I Scuba dive? (Even though I haven't in over five years.)
• Can I ride Roller Coasters? (Even though I haven't in three years.)
• How much does this cost? (I have insurance.)
• Will I ever play the violin? (Even though I can't now!)
• If a train heading east leaves Chicago at 12:45...the Doc may not know the answer to this one!

I am willing to entertain questions here but by the time anyone sends a question in, the appointment will be over, so...never mind!

A Flurry of Activities

Much is getting accomplished. This always happens in the week running up to the Solstice Party. I probably accomplish more in this week than in the whole rest of the year.

Phil is back working on the front porch. We found a LOT of dry rot in the boards around the columns and piers so we thought we better get that nipped in the bud before painting continues.

Here's a problem with having an old house. You can't find replacement lumber. They don't make it any more. The sample of porch decking I took to Windsor Plywood was not available. They just don't make that size anymore. I could get a tongue and groove board that was a quarter inch thinner, for all the good that would do me.

Same story with the trim molding I took in. AND with the piece of siding I gave them. Nuthin!

Fortunately, one of the guys who works there said he could mill me what I needed of the moulding AND the decking. In fact, he has done it already. I have to go pick it up tonight.

I'm not sure yet what I'm going to do about the siding I need. Windsor directed me to Spokane Cedar Products. We'll see what happens.

I finished the Squirrel Hole. It looks fabulous if you don't care about workmanship or quality. I'm hoping painting will help hide the imperfections. I depend a LOT on paint.

Painting and Solstice Prep

The painting has begun on the front of the house. That is a problem as I still have to finish my work on the squirrel hole. I tried to get some work accomplished on it last night but quickly determined I had the wrong nails. I split the cedar shakes as soon as I hit the nail a second time. I have these big ol' roofing nails and I need something much smaller and more delicate.

In the meantime, we are getting dangerously close to the Summer Solstice party and we still haven't completed the invitation. Hopefully, we'll have that done tonight...certainly no later than tomorrow. The solstice is just 10 days away.

I bought a grape vine the other day to replace the Clematis that didn't survive the winter. It is a Savignon Franc grape vine and it cost $6.99. The vines I bought last year were more like $18.00 and they are not as tall as this one. Of course, they were poisoned by the yard guy so they have been fighting their way back to health.

Defibri-Stan

I have a Doctor's appointment today to determine if I should get my very own on-board defibrillator as an addition to my standard equipment. Susan and I are are meeting with my Cardiologist's "Electrician" to ask lots of questions.

Afterwards, I might have some answers. And I will share them here.

After the Appointment: The "Electrician" is Dr Eteri Byazrova. She is about four feet tall. She could fit in my palm. She's tiny. Clearly, she is not from this country but that is not an issue for me. Competence is an issue for me and Susan and I both got the Comp Vibe from this eensy little woman.

I asked her for her assessment of my health. She says I am in good shape for someone with MyoCardio Myopathy. That was good to hear. However, there are to be more tests.

A heart takes in blood and ejects it to the body as it beats. I assume that everyone knows that. The Ejection Fraction is a valuation of the amount of blood the heart ejects. A healthy heart has an ejection fraction of 55 to 70 percent. Mine is somewhere between 30 and 40%. The task now is to determine as close to possible what the number is. And so, there are to be more tests.

If the number is 35% or below, the defib will be installed. If I am above 35%, there are other options to discuss. And then, there will be more tests.

Another Harvest

I have hired a Lawn Service who sprays fertilizer and weed killer every few weeks. They have made two visits so far. The lawn in the front yard is really coming in nicely. My complaint is that I can barely get by mowing once a week. By the time I do mow, it is genuinely needed. I harvested about 10 bushels of grass last night.

If I had a sprinkler system, the whole yard would probably be looking pretty good. I have sections that just don't get enough water. I have to concentrate on those areas.

Mark down June 4th as the day the Carriage House Paint Job was completed. It looks really good. Now our painter is moving on to the front of the house. She started power washing yesterday. I imagine she'll have a few days of prep work. This now means that I have to finish my "Squirrel Hole" project up on the balcony. Yeah, it's not done yet. We've been busy painting windows.

Drive By Neighborhood Safety

I completely forgot to report on a Drive-By Shooting incident in the neighborhood on Saturday night.

It was about 10:30 and I had gone to bed. I had only been in bed a short while when I heard four loud booms, clearly gunfire, coming from just down the street...just a couple of houses away, in fact.

I raced to the front balcony but the car from which the shots were fired had already sped by and made its way down to the end of the street. I would not have had much of a window to see it because of all tree branches blocking my view.

We called 911 to report the incident and then I went out front to see if other neighbors were responding. There were a couple who came out.

The cops showed up and looked around and asked some questions, but none of us had anything to offer other than we heard shots. We couldn't tell which way they went, what type of car it was, or any other, you know, facts to help them find out who did this.

I learned the next day that the police found five shotgun shells by the side of the road in the park. They must have been firing into the park. Sounds like some pranksters.

It appears they have pulled off the perfect crime and will probably get away to fire into another empty park in another neighborhood.

Weekend Sicky

I started to develop a cold last Wednesday. I have not treated myself very well since then and the cold still persists. I am finally taking today (a Monday) to try and get well. So my workplace suffers whilst I recover. (Boy, I'm really thinking a LOT of myself to consider my company suffering because I am not there)

I tried to paint yesterday but didn't last long. We will have to finish up later this week. I don't think we'll suffer any major consequences.

On the bright side, looky what Phil accomplished! He got that whole project done in two days. That is a record for any project we have done on this house. Prior to this, anything we have done was mandated to last at least a week and usually into months.

Now we are ready to paint. However, we are considering having him do the same on the other column. It is not nearly as bad but there was a great deal of dry rotted wood that made up the frame of that pier. Who's to say that the other isn't far from the same condition.

I would also like to take the opportunity to show off the Hops again. This is the Hallertau vine and it has surpassed se7en feet. It grows a few inches every day. The Sterling is doing equally well although slightly shorter.

I have learned that hops likes acidic soil and coffee grounds are a good source to provide that acidity. I have been collecting grounds from both work places and home but it occurred to me yesterday to stop by my favorite coffee joint and collect them from there. The girl happily complied and with one dip, filled my little bucket with more coffee grounds than I could collect in a week from my other sources.

Go Hops, GO!

And now, time for a nap!

Porch Work

Pictured above is a shot of the house back in December. There was three feet of snow on the ground and every day was an adventure. I chose this picture to point out the piers upon which the columns are seated. They have both settled after one hundred years but the one on the left has significant settling. If you follow the siding from left to right, you will see that it is overlapping the siding below it.

This is a condition we were aware of when we bought the house. It was an obvious problem but not one that needed immediate attention. Four years later, we have decided to attend to it. There is no danger of it collapsing or anything but we are going to start painting the house this summer and this is a situation that needs to be fixed prior to painting.

As a Quazi-Amature Builder, I have elected to job this one out. We have hired our friend and consultant Phil to perform this job. Phil has worked on many house projects in the past. The upstairs balcony, the doors in the Carriage House, things like that. He had nothing to do with the gas pipe.Here is his progress after one day. I am not sure how he plans to jack that column up but I will find out tomorrow when I see him.

I haven't had a chance to see him because we are busy downtown still. I had to bartend today so Susan spent a good deal of time downtown getting us caught up. We have one skywalk left and I hope we can complete it tomorrow. We may have to work on Monday night as well. We'll see how things go.

This skywalk on Main Street is the one we completed today. Even with tinted windows, it loks great in the afternoon sun.

Memorial Weekend Fun

We went camping over Memorial Day. We went to Sullivan Lake, about 90 miles north of Spokane, almost to the Canadian border. We camped with my buddy Rob and his sigot (significant other) Olga, plus her daughter Natalie.

This was a different type of camping for Susan and I as Rob as a nice big roomy trailer with many of the comforts of home. We usually camp in a tent.

I reserved a campsite in the Sullivan Lake campground back in March. It turns out I picked one of the better ones; close to water and bathroom but tucked back from the main road so it felt secluded.

The weather was great and I spent Saturday night sleeping under the stars. It was chilly but my sleeping bag kept me toasty and the bright night sky was beautiful.

Here are a few selected photos.

Fun was had by all but I spent a good deal of my lounging time thinking about all the things I should be doing at home. I need help!

The Wonder of Nature's Miracle

Or the Nature of Miracle's Wonder.

The Miracle of Wonder's Nature.

Blah blah blah

I have the morning off as I have an appointment with the Cardiologist to discuss my waning health...or least my totally fabricated sense of my waning health.

In the meantime, I have been out fussing in the yard. I sprayed down the dandelions, I did a little watering and I did some urban landscape planning.

Pictured below is one of the lovely trees in our front yard. On the left is a shot of one of the many flowers sprouting all about the lovely trees. I counted 30 before I gave up. There is probably something like ten thousand of them.

On the right is the evil spawn that those flowers will produce and drop upon the lawn this fall. I have a hard time justifying the beauty of the flower that is there for about four days against the major pain in the ass chestnuts that will be around for decades.

To our credit, I had a hard time finding that chestnut to use as an example. We cleaned up pretty good last Autumn. It's hard now to think back and remember all the back breaking work we did. I'm sure it will come back (breaking) to me.

Bike to Work Week

Last week was "Bike to Work Week" and it was a pretty crappy week of weather for the event. I tried several times to ride my bike but the weather just would not cooperate.

Yesterday was a very nice day and would have been perfect for a bike ride. Unfortunately, I had a meeting after work that prevented me from biking. I could have ridden today except for the rain and the wind.

Perhaps tomorrow...oh wait! I have an event to attend after work. I might be able to bike there and then meet Susan and ride home with her. But I probably won't.

Maybe Thursday...oh wait! I have a Doctor's appointment that morning. Still, I could ride to work after that.

How 'bout Friday. Nope! Leaving work early that day to prepare for the three day weekend. I have many home improvement projects planned for Memorial Day.

I'll try to make riding my bike to work happen in June.

More Money for Nothin'

We took a much needed day off from working on the house in order to go downtown and work in a skywalk.

Hoopfest is a big event here in Spokaloo...as big as Bloomsday or Laundryday. Susan and I have been commissioned again this year to decorate some of the skywalks downtown to help jazz up and promote the event.Above is an artist rendering of how I envisioned a typical skywalk would look when completed. This is the picture I sent to the Hoopfest peoples to get their approval.Here is a photo of an actually completed skywalk that we painted today. This was our first so we knew it would take a while to complete. Five and a half hours was our time. That means, between Susan and I, we earned about $4.37 per hour.

We are both pretty pleased with the outcome. Although, if you were to walk through the skywalk, you would wonder what Fourth Grader they got to paint this crappy looking artwork on the windows. It looks much better from the street.

We chose to paint this skywalk first because it is directly adjacent to the Hoopfest offices. When the Hoopfest peoples arrive at work in the morning, they will look out their windows and see how fabulous they are...and thereby making Susan and I fabulous as well.

My Buds

Finally, the grape vines are showing signs of life. They are budding and starting to grow. This is not a great picture of the plant but you can see the leafs and the buds. I am so happy!

In the meantime, I am so sad. It continues to look as though the Clamatis has not survived the winter. I am going to hold out some hope that it is just sleeping a bit longer and getting ready to explode.

The Garage

Last night, I installed a bike lift in the garage for the tandem bike. I bought it at Joe's Sporting Goods, a national chain that is going out of biz. It works great! It lifted the bike easily off the ground and out of the way. Now I have to get out there and clean out all the other crap that has been building up for...well, we've been here four and half years now.

I'm continuing my daily battle with dandelions. I got a big bottle of Weed B Gon a couple of weeks ago. It's a concentrate bottle that you mix with water so I have plenty of ammo. But it seems the damn things sprout up new flowers everyday. I must be vigilant.

AND, I still have to get back out on the roof and finish my repair job for the squirrel hole.

Then after that....